Topsey's Exotic Ranch, Adults Only

A hundred and one years ago, Munoz had a nice long 4 day weekend. Well actually, that happens pretty frequently. They get more 4 day weekends than anyone else in the world, except maybe the French. And in celebration of this fairly common event we decided to go out into the world and see what we could find. Little did we know, that we were about to spend the best 20 bucks ever. Honestly, it was better than the 20 we had to pay for our marriage license.

Allow me to introduce all y'all to Topsey's Exotic Ranch and Drive Thru Safari, located conveniently just on the outskirts of the country bumpkin town we live in!

The tigers were kind of a buzz kill.

How To Decorate Cakes When You're Awesome

So 100 years ago, we had our first widdle one year anniversary! It was lots and lots and lots of fun. There was plenty of reminiscing, and ink jet printed cards and lovey doveyness. There was also plenty of cake. Some people may consider a 9 inch double layer Lemon Spice Cake with Lemon Cream Cheese Frosting too much for two people who are carb sensitive and prone to fatness of the face, but luckily neither one of us married anyone like that.

Fun Face Fatness Fact

Today the guard at the West Fort Hood gate asked me to take off my sunglasses because he didn't believe that my military ID picture and my human face matched. And then he said,

"Wow, is that really you?! That's not a very good picture."

True story.

Back to the cake..... here's a picture of the luscious Lemon Spice cake that I made from scratch and then frosted lovingly and professionally:

Isn't that nice? Lovely, refined, respectable, subtle and very posh. The perfect way to celebrate a pretty crazy one year journey into adulthood, marriage, responsibilities, taking out the trash, paying all of our own bills, making sure the doors locked at night and closing the fridge when we're not actively getting something out (we're still working on that one).

Very Better Homes and Garden, if I do say so myself.

As I was patting myself on the back, picturing a future spread in Martha Stewart Magazine, a small thought with a small voice made itself known in my head.

"What if there was more?" the small voice said.

And before I could get ahold of myself, I was on the phone to my sister (not this one, the other one) whose very poor and yet somewhat awesome advice led me to to do this:

And this:

And this:

And also this:

And I believe the conversation went something like this:

Me: "Hey I made a cake and I think it needs just a little something extra on top. I have strawberries, coconut flakes, mint leaves, food coloring and icing.

Which one should I use?"

Sister: "You made a whole cake just for the two of you?

Are you trying to win a couples Fat Face Contest?"

"NO! IT'S OUR FIRST ANNIVERSARY, STUPID."

"Oh. You should use ALL OF THEM."

And that's all the direction I needed.

Now I remember clearly discussing restraint in art school. I remember talking about how sometimes, a little is just enough, and how you can make a stronger statement by using a lighter touch, if everything is a 10 then no one notices, but if somethings are a 2 then the 10 gets proper attention and so on and so forth and whatnot etc.

That's all very well and good, but when it comes to frosting, I'm more of a Dr. Suess disciple.

The Dr. Suess School of Thought goes something like this:

More is more, and more is better so everything needs to be at an 11 or crazier if at all possible. And if you happen to appreciate the aesthetic of 14 year old girls who are in love with their algebra teachers (HI MR. CARCICH!!!!!), then GO WITH IT.

Here's what our cake looked like a mere 18 hours later:

Honestly, I'm surprised it lasted that long.